Kids and Toilets

It's official, folks. Japanese kids can't wee themselves. By that, I mean they can't go to the toilet properly. According to the article (which you can read here from Mainichi), and I quote:

"...increasingly large numbers of Japanese children, especially little boys, don't know how to pee properly..."

Now I know guys can't pee properly and we like to pee over and around the bowl, basically pee anywhere except for the bowl (but we do aim for the bowl, no, really, we do!), but now even little boys are doing that?

I guess it's understandable. Remember, traditional Japanese toilets (which are still in abundance in Japan) are nothing like Western-style toilets. When you use the toilet for the first time, it's like operating a James Bond gadget. And anyone who doesn't have the brain of James Bond can make quite a mess of himself, especially when it comes to which way is the front.

But that's not really the problem here, at the end of the article, an expert claimed that "some children deliberately urinate all over the place or defecate in their parents' shoes... trying to attract their parents' attention." What kind of kid in their right mind think that shitting in a shoe would attract the attention that they were looking for?

They will attract my attention alright. I'll spank the shit out of them that they'll never shit again.

Children nowadays. If I did that when I was a kid, I probably won't be here writing about it.